The Clothes Peg Diet

The Clothes Peg Diet
Reading Time: 2 minutes


A brand new diet craze has hit our shores; the Clothes Peg Diet.

Proven by research to limit the amount we eat by suppressing hormones linked to hunger, a simple clothes peg worn on your nose can reduce your calorie intake at a single meal by 54%!

Prof Jerry Tomkins of the University of Colnbrook says “This research is groundbreaking in its field; for such a huge breakthrough to be made in natural appetite suppressant for weight loss is critical in our fight against obesity.” He went on to say “For years we’ve been relying on chemical cures to tackle overeating and prevent weight gain, but to find a drug free remedy is what we all would prefer.”

Set to rock the diet industry, the Clothes Peg Diet is cheap to implement, and with no special rules or requirements anyone can start right away. Fat inhibitor makers Fatblock are upset by the news, saying that “If anyone thinks that wearing a clothes peg on their nose is any less embarrassing than the anal seepage experienced on our diet pills then they’ve got another thing coming! At least with Fatblock you can wear incontinence pads, but these clothes pegs will be worn on your face!”

Salad and grill giant Harvester has already jumped on the clothes peg bandwagon by offering all customers clothes pegs alongside their salad cart buffet, in an attempt to help its customers cut the pounds.

So why not try it today, wear a clothes peg whilst sitting down to your Easter roast this bank holiday Monday, and see how much less you eat!

April Fools

Georgina Spenceley
Georgina Spenceley

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